I’m really tired of people being labeled as anti-trans if they dare mention that the unknowing spouse a trans person married suffers. If they mention that someone they love is suffering right this minute because it’s pretty traumatic. Actually, if you were to read my recent work, you’d find a lot of trans support. I just wrote about an anti LGBTQ school in my area a week ago. All you’re doing is pushing away allies. It wouldn’t hurt you a bit to acknowledge that the left behind spouse often suffers and that people who know they are trans should disclose this to the person they marry. I invite you to think about it.